Memorial Day 2014

    Today, 26 May 2014, is Memorial Day in the United States.  For all too many the day will pass as just another long weekend to bring in the long days of Summer.  For those who have been personally touched by war it will never be just another long weekend to enjoy.  As it should be for all, today will forever be a reminder of the ultimate sacrifice on a battlefield in a distant land.  As I sit in my office on Kandahar Air Field just outside of Kandahar, Afghanistan I find that my mind wanders to the memories of 24 Soldiers that I have personally been involved in their memorials in my career and the number of others that I have supervised. 19 of those 24 were killed while deployed to Iraq in 2004 - 2005. I refuse to allow their memories to be forgotten. 

"Ode of Remembrance," from "For the Fallen,"

by Laurence Binyon

They shall grow not old, as we that are left grow old:

Age shall not weary them, nor the years condemn.

At the going down of the sun and in the morning, We will remember them.

     The following is from my speach that I gave at the Memorial Day Ceremony we conducted here on KAF in Afghanistan.

            Matthew 5:4 says, “Blessed are those who mourn.  They will be comforted.”

            Memorial Day for many of us will never be the same because at some time in the last 13 years of war or in wars previous a family member or a friend was killed in combat defending the country they loved.  There are very few of us that have not been personally impacted by the death of a loved one or a friend. 

Because of the death of a loved one or a friend Memorial Day is a day filled with mixed emotions.  Our emotions are impacted by the memories of Memorial Days of years gone by where we spent time bringing in the summer days on a long weekend with family and friends.  Those memories are now impacted by the memory of the death of someone close to us on a battlefield somewhere defending the country we all love.

            We each deal with our emotions in our own way some will do it openly others privately.  They will allow themselves to feel, to hurt, to grieve. They will laugh and they will cry.  They will at times sit quietly and remember and at other times they will share those memories.

            It is events like this one today where we find strength and comfort in the loss of that individual as we gather with family and friends or even strangers for a moment to give honor to those who paid the ultimate price for the freedom of others.  We grieve as individuals and as a country for the loss of that friend or family member alongside one another.  It is not whether we knew the person that was killed it is the point of giving honor and sharing for a moment in the pain. 

It is in allowing ourselves to feel whatever the emotions may be that we find the comfort we need.  We find the strength in people gathering to remember that today is not just another holiday but it is a day set aside to give honor to those who stood up and said I will not allow evil to prevail.  I will do my part to bring good into this world.  It is why each of us are standing here in Afghanistan because we are willing to say not on my watch will evil prevail.  So today is not just a holiday but a holy day, not in that is has spiritual significance, but in the fact that it is a day set aside to bring honor to those who gave all.

Today is not just about feeling the emotions and grieving to be comforted but it is a day to honor all who have stood on that battlefield and said not on my watch.  The fear of many Gold Star Families is that their family member will be forgotten by the world.  That the world will not remember the sacrifice paid by their family member on a battlefield for the freedoms we enjoy.

As much as we have said we will not allow evil to prevail on our watch.  We also need to say that we will not let those who sacrificed all to be forgotten on our watch.  Romans 13:7 says “Pay everyone whatever you owe them.  If you owe someone respect, respect that person.  If you owe them honor, honor that person.”

We owe those killed in combat and their Gold Star Families respect and honor.  We must do our part to show that honor and not allow these individuals to be forgotten.  We do this by sharing the stories of the individuals who paid the ultimate price.  The fallen may be gone but let us not allow them ever to be forgotten. For in giving honor where honor is due we then provide comfort for the grief.

Blessings of 2013

     As the New Year comes I often reflect on the past year.  It seems that I do this even more while deployed.  So here I sit in Afghanistan reflecting over 2013 as I watch the last few minutes of this year tick away soon a fresh year will begin.  As a Facebook post I saw said, "Soon an old year will pass and you will have a fresh 365 pages to write on in the new year.  What will you write on those pages."  
     Before I begin to write on this new year's pages I want to reflect on the blessings of this past year.  I see this not so much a longing for the old as it is giving honor to God for what he gave me this past year.

     I will always consider myself blessed that another year has gone by and I have my bride still by my side.  This past year we celebrated 27 years of marriage and 28 years of being together.  She has put up with much over these years and once again another deployment.  FaceTime is a great thing for even now I can watch her as she busies herself around the house to prepare for her own New Years celebration with family and friends.  Modern technology is a blessing that allows me to celebrate New Years with her even 7000 miles away.

     A blessing that keeps on giving year after year is our girls in our lives.  God may have not given us children in the way we expected but we are rich to have such amazing beautiful women in our lives and their families.  I am not sure how we came about to deserve such great rewards and honor but yet God has indeed blessed us.

     Facebook has been shown to be a challenge at times in many of our lives.  Yet I found it as a great tool to keep in touch with family and friends as the Army sends me around the world.  Facebook was a great blessing this past year as it allowed me to connect to some special people that I had lost contact with many years ago.  I was just a young boy and they younger then me when, for various reasons and circumstances, we lost contact with one another.  Yet this year I received a tremendous blessing and that was an opportunity to reconnect with cousins from my Dad's side.  One by one I was able to reach out and connect with them through Facebook

     There were times over the years I thought I would never see them again.  Yet 2013 has been a time to get to know them.  To learn of their lives and to be a part of their family.  I look forward to the day that I can see them face to face and we get to laugh and cry and grow closer as family.

     Another blessing is the development of friendships at the church we attend off post in Colorado Springs.  You have to understand that as a Army chaplain I am often leading or assisting at services on the installation I am stationed at.  Rarely having the opportunity to develop connections with those in my denomination.  This year I feel I was able to make friends and solidify those relationships so even if we move away from Colorado Springs I know that when we retire back to the Springs we will just be going home to those at the church.

     2013 has had its rough patches along the way.  Out of the ashes of those rough areas new friendships arose.  What Satan used to attempt to destroy God used to build bonds that were used to strengthen others.

     Proverbs 16:9 says, "A person may plan his own journey, but the Lord directs his steps." I am not sure that I would have planned all that 2013 brought my way, to include a deployment to Afghanistan.  What I have learned over the years is that God does bless the path he takes me on.  I am amazed at where my life has come.  I have done more and achieved more then I could ever have imagined in both my personal and professional life.

     I am not sure what God has in store for 2014.  I am pretty sure that it will likely involve another permanent change of station (PCS) which will be our 7th in 9 years.  Thankfully it will also include a redeployment from Afghanistan.  This I do know that though I may plan my journey I will always pray for God to direct my steps.

     It is now almost 30 minutes into the new year.  My prayer for you is that you too will allow God to order your steps.  That in the midst of trials in the new year you will find blessings.  Happy New Year and may each blank page of each day be written on wisely.

I Have Become What I Avoided....I Am Them.

     I come from a great heritage of military service.  I have several uncles, my dad, my brother and my little sister who have served or are currently serving.  I also married my 1st Sergeant's daughter as a private.  Yes I live life on the edge.  With this great heritage comes great training and understanding of what is important and what is not important as you serve.  Much of what my father and father-in-law taught me as I grew up in and around the military has stayed with me throughout my almost 30 years of service.

     Such things as it is not about me it is about those who are on the left and right of me.  Junior enlisted and those junior to you eat first.  You take care of your troops and ensure they have what they need then you take care of yourself.

     Most of my thirty years have been served at battalion or lower.  In fact I did not move up to battalion level until I took my commission as an officer and joined the Chaplain Corps.  As a jr. enlisted and young NCO the them was battalion or higher.  When I went to work as at battalion level, for there is no choice as a chaplain that is the lowest level we are assigned to, the them shifted.  In fact the them was not even brigade the them was division.

     In 2004 I deployed to Iraq with Task Force 2-2 Infantry, 3rd Brigade, 1st Infantry Division.  We were stationed in a place called Muqdadiyah, Iraq at Forward Operating Base (FOB) Normandy.  A very large former Iraqi military base that had been looted by villagers in the area.  Our lone battalion was responsible for securing this base which was large enough for a brigade at least.  It needed work and though some was done by the previous unit much was still to be done.

    We did what we could to make this place safe and livable for it was our home away from home for a year.  Though improvements were being done daily if you did not live there you would sometimes have trouble seeing the improvements if you did not stay there long.

     It soon became evident that there was an us and a them.  The them was not the enemy it was division.  We heard often that we were not doing enough to improve the FOB.  We heard  it so much that we created a video to compare how us and them lived.  For the them lived in a palace.  No, literally they lived or at least worked in one of Saddam's palaces.  

    The us not so much.  Many of our buildings had no windows or doors.  Our dining facility had concrete slabs when we arrived for tables and snakes would occasionally drop from the ceiling.  Hot water showers were occasional at best and our power would often go out.  We did improve things in the year we were there because we were not going to live a year with the FOB in that condition but there was still a divide between the us and them. 

     Why do I share this because in the last year I have risen to division level and I am now a part of them.  I like to say I have become what I have avoided for almost 30 years.  I do not think I will ever truly become a them because I am sure that my father and father-in-law would have much to say about that if my wife did not get to me first.  Yet I find myself sometimes feeling a bit guilty in the location I am stationed at in Afghanistan.  The room I have is far removed from the place that I was at almost 10 years ago.  I have indoor plumbing and not a piss tube or a outhouse that the tub has to be removed and the human waste burned while you stir.  There is a bit of guilt because I have seen some of the other bases here in Afghanistan and I know they do not live in the standards that I am enjoying at Kandahar Air Field.

     In a way having the above video is a reminder to me that I may be up with the them but I do well in remembering that there is an us that my responsibility is to serve and not lord over.  The scripture verse comes to mind of John 17:14 - 19 that speaks to being in the world but not of the world.  Just as the disciples were in the world and effected change maybe I can be them in order to effect change not in the way it was done when I was in 2-2 but in a better way.  I guess if I want to impact the Army in the way I want to it is better to be at this level for I impact more.  May I do it in such away that I never lose sight of the us.

Why I Serve...

Basic Combat Training 1985

In my 29 years of service the question that I have heard most often is why do I serve.

     I have often thought long about that answer. My initial reason for joining was simple.  I joined because of love of country, love of military and most of all because of the call to serve and before I became a chaplain I wanted to experience being a Soldier.

     My continual service has to do with my love for God and the place he has called me to be and my love for Soldiers.  If I was asked today why I serve it would because of the following stories about two Soldiers.

     I often sit back in amazement that I get to serve along some of the most amazing men and women in the world.

     In the very early morning hours of 6 Oct 2013 a unit went on a raid here in Afghanistan.  The raid went downhill fast and there were many wounded and a number killed.  All the Soldiers in the raid are an inspiration, two Soldiers standout to me.

SGT/Team Leader 3rd PLT 670th MP Co 2nd Row 4th from left. Late '80s

     Soldier one who I can only imagine was either the medic or a leader of some sort.  Arrives at the Role III hospital (the highest level of care before going to Germany) and steps off the aircraft injured with a tourniquet around one of his arm.  He drops his gear and only when he knows his team is being taken care of he allows himself to become a patient.

     Solider two is lying in the ICU.  Tubes sticking out of him and he is incubated.  His right arm is wrapped and splinted.  The command arrives to do a Purple Heart Ceremony for the wounded from the night before. The medical staff is sure that this Soldier will not respond and likely not to remember the event.  The command presents this Soldier with his Purple Heart.  They begin to present his Combat Infantry Badge when he begins moving his right arm.  The doc presses in and attempts to calm the kid down.  The kid continues to move his arm from under the blanket.  They continue to attempt to calm him down.  He finally gets his right arm out from under the covers and then fights with the tubes and splint and he then presents the best salute that he can render under his conditions.

Battalion Chaplain 2-2 Infantry Regiment 2004

     Two men who are an amazing inspiration to all.  One put his men before himself the other in the midst of his medical condition still renders appropriate honors.

     This is not the first time I witnessed such greatness.  I have been blessed to see such greatness over and over again in the last 29 years.  I serve because God called me here.  I serve because of great men and women like these.

     I am honored to serve along such greatness.

Love

This year my wife and I will celebrate 27 years of marriage. In today's world that is forever. Yet I feel like I have only just begun since my grandparents this past year just before my grandfather died celebrated 70 years. 

To say it has always been wedded bliss would be a lie. We are two individuals who come from different backgrounds. We have had our ups and downs. Yet I would not return a single year back. Well save the around four years I have been gone with the Army. I would exchanges those for four years to be home. Apostle Paul sad there would be problems in marriage. 

We were married young she 19 me 18. She was my 1st Sergeants daughter. Yes I live life on the edge. I was a mere PV2, E-2. Barely had mosquito wings to hold down my collar.

She interestingly enough said three nevers and got me. Never marry someone from her home town. Never marry some one in the military. Never marry a minister. God must have been laughing hard when we hooked up. 

As she sleeps here beside me I cannot help but think about my up coming deployment and her once again taking care of the home front. I long to stay home with her. Yet I raised my right hand and swore to support and defend . . . .  My evaluations have always said to send me to the toughest jobs, and that the Army has done. 

I am proud of my wife for with each tough assignment she has been there to support me during the good, the bad, and the ugly. There has been much ugly. 

Proverbs says that a man who finds a good wife has found a great thing. I am extremely blessed to have found my bride. I love you babe. 

Eighth Anniversary of Phantom Fury Nov 2004

Today marks the 8th anniversary of the assault on Fallujah, Iraq, known as Phantom Fury.  Due to good PR by the Marines the assault is often seen as a Marine assault.  In actuality it was group effort by all branches.  I like to say that the Marines could not handle it so they called in the Army who helped get their butts out of Fallujah.  The picture to the right is but part of the story of the units that were part of the attack or supported the attack.  I will not allow the Marines to take full credit for something that others fought along side them to do, rid the city of insurgents. 

When you look at this picture look at the unit on the far right.  "Army 2-2 INF" is the unit I was a part of during this time.  I was granted the honor by the U.S. Army to serve with TF 2-2 for three years.  The sector we were given as you can see was the west sector.  This was the industrial sector it was also beside the main highway out of town.  This is where the insurgents had their bomb and IED factories.  This is where some of the greatest fighting took place.

CPT Fred Dente and my assistant PFC Figaroa

You see the Marines had not been in Fallujah for three months.  When we arrived at Camp Fallujah the story is told that the Marines asked some of my joes what they did in our sector and cities in Iraq.  My Soldiers told them that we go into our cities we patrol them and rid them of the insurgents.  The Marines were shocked by this and said they had not been in their cities in three months.  Three months was plenty of time for the insurgents to gain a strong hold on the city of Fallujah.  And a strong hold they had.  They had taken US supplied barriers and used them for themselves.  Booby trapped homes.  Laid bombs and IEDs along the roads etc.  

SSG James Matteson

The fight that we were about to enter into on 8 Nov 2004 was not going to be an easy fight.  The projected losses were expected to be 50 to 80%.  My unit and I were prepared to do what we had to and prepared to pay the price because that is what we do.  Fortunately we had great leadership such as LTC Peter Newell, CPT Fred Dente, CSM Faulkenburg, SGM Bohn, 1SG Lewis, CPT Sean Sims, CPT Doug Walters, SFC Chris Simmons and others.  We had with us the best medical team a unit could ask for in doctors and medics.  This combination and the great Soldiers that were in TF 2-2 we were not going to allow there to be a 50 to 80% casualty rate.

SPC Jennifer Amato Smith

On November 8 we set outside the city and under the cover of darkness we breeched the north side of the city.  As 2-2 breeched through the raised train tracks that held booby traps and explosives the Marine unit beside us struggled with their breech in their area.  They had already lost three Marines attempting to do a breech.  They then called us and requested to use our breeched area because they could not get through.  Just one of several challenges the Marines had that we had to save their butts on.

The fight lasted two weeks.  In this time our unit used 900 rounds of artillery for our sector alone.  The amazing thing was we used that many rounds and one of the guns automatic loaders was down and they had to do it manually.  Untold rounds form Close Air Support (CAS) and countless rounds of small arms, 20mm, and tank rounds.  In the end we had only 43 casualties.  Most were returned to duty (RTD), 4 were evacuated to high hospital care yet would survive their wounds and eventually return to 2-2.  Four individuals would pay the ultimate price, CSM Steven Faulkenburg, 1LT Edward Iwan, CPT Sean Sims, and SSG James Matteson.

I will not sit by and allow the annals of history to record that the fight in Fallujah in Nov 2004, which is still studied to as one of the greatest battles of Iraq since the invasion, to be seen as just a Marines battle. For along the Marines fought amazing men and women of the Army and the greatest of these units in my opinion, as biased as it might be, was 2nd Battalion 2nd Infantry Regiment, 3rd Brigade, 1st Infantry Division, known as the Ramrods and TF 2-2.

The Marines awarded TF 2-2 their patch as a combat patch as a form of thank you for what we did for them.  I wear that patch proudly today for two reasons.  One in honor of those men who died in the Battle of Fallujah and two because it makes the Marines mad that I can wear their patch and they cannot.  Here is to the men and women of TF 2-2 who are some of the most amazing people on earth.  May God bless them and their families.

America

(Que patriotic thème music)

I was just outside taking care of a chore after watching the presidential debate. I started doing the chore with some since of frustration and concern over where this nation was heading.  As I mulled over the things that I have seen and heard concerning this election I suddenly found myself filled with a great sense of pride in this country.

Why pride when it seems there is more divisiveness then ever before.  At times there seems to be greater divides by race, creed, sexual orientation, etc then there has been in the past.  So why should I be proud in divisveness?  Why would I be proud over the fact that some of my friends who are ultra conservatives are in heated debates with some of my friends who are ultra liberal?  I am not proud because of the divisiveness and what seems to be direct attacks on one another.  No, I would prefer that we were all in the same place.  Yet the reality is that we are not.  None the less I am proud.

I am proud because in 1984 (insert Orson Wells book 1984 references now) as a senior in high school I went down and signed my name to join the Nevada Army National Guard.  This past September I celebrated 28 plus years of service in the United States Army, active and national guard.  I am proud of this country and it's election process.  I am proud of the freedoms, and the pursuit of liberty and happiness for all these reasons and the opportunity to minister to those who serve is why I signed my name on the dotted line.  I do not always agree with what friends and family say, yet this is one of the reasons I serve because I believe in the process.  I believe that we should be able to voice our opinions on Facebook without fear of censorship from the government like many countries.

Yes, I am well aware that as an commissioned officer and a member of the armed forces I do not always enjoy some of the same freedoms that I stand guard and protect for the citizens of this great country, like freedom to openly discuss our politicians.  None the less I am proud of this country.  In my time of service I have been to Honduras, Korea, Japan, Europe, Kosovo, Iraq, and Kuwait.  I have seen the worse of the world and the worse of countries.  I am proud that I do not live in places like Russia and Venezuela that has rigged elections, and it is just amazing that dictators are magically elected over and over.  I am proud that I do not live in places like Iran or China that censors and limits their citizens freedom to express themselves in an open forum.

What does bother me is when someone says I am not going to vote.  I understand their point.  I understand their frustration with the choice or lack of choice they feel they have.  I have indeed served and risk my life for them to have the right not to vote.  I have seen men be permanently injured and killed for this right.  For those who are considering this choice let me share a story with you and consider your choice.

In 2004 I was serving with a great group of men and women in 2-2 Infantry in Iraq.  During our deployment the first election in Iraq was held.  As the election time approached the enemy threatened the citizens were with their lives if they showed up to the polling areas.  At great risk to their lives and many having to travel great distance by both foot, car, and cart began arriving at the polling areas to place a vote.  While standing in line many polling areas were hit by rockets and mortars.  Lives were lost, people were injured.  Those in line would help care for the casualties and then get back in line to vote.

What are you willing to risk to ensure you keep what they were willing to lose.  Even if you vote none of the above you have allowed your voice to be heard.  If you choose to stay at home you have done nothing for the process and thus have no reason to complain for you silenced your voice.

Let us consider another fact that is as important and in some ways even more important then the Presidential Election.  What is more important in some ways is the election of our Senate and House of Representatives.  You want to have an impact consider that vote.  The president does nothing aside from executive order outside of those two houses.  The president that accomplishes much will not depend on an Republican or Democratic Congress.  The president that accomplishes much understands that he will be best served by working with congress.  So educate yourself on those who are running for those offices.  Ensure that we put the right people in there so that this country will move forward.

A final note to those that choose to hide or deny that the election process is even happening.  Take your head out of the sand.  Seek information and educate yourself and your family on the issues not on the individual.  For whether you like it or not in a few weeks an election will take place.  If you have not educated yourself and simply vote along party lines you may be the vote that puts someone in that on the surface is one thing and once in office turns out to be something else.

So I am proud of my 28 plus years of service to this great country because we have the rights to vote, to argue, to debate and at times agree to disagree.  You do not have to agree with the military but do not squander the time we have put to protect your rights.  Do not let the deaths of those who have served since the inception of this great country to be in vain.  Be proud of your country again and vote.